Something has been unfolding in the background. And interestingly, it’s not a big, bold move, more of a quiet return to myself and to the things that truly matter to me.
When I decided to move to Lisbon for the summer, I thought I was saying goodbye to my “old life” and stepping into this new chapter in a new city, building a new home, new me, new everything. In my mind, it was this shiny new thing that got me all excited. Now one might say, “Caitlin, that’s a typical case of shiny object syndrome” (yes, you can Google that).
But is it though?
Because I realised this city adventure has been exactly what I needed to return to myself and what’s truly important to me. And I did genuinely feel called to make a change and step into a new environment.
What this season has really shown me
On the one hand, I’d say unexpected things have unfolded. On the other hand, looking at my vision board for 2025 (which is a vibe, not materialistic things), everything is unfolding exactly the way it’s meant to be. And I needed a little detour to get there.
Let me correct that: not a detour, simply a change in environment.
By stepping away for a moment, I’ve been able to explore a new version of myself. A more feminine, confident and grounded version of myself. That woman I’ve been seeing in my visualisations, feeling the energy she radiates. And I genuinely believe I needed to step away from my comfortable environment to unfold into this new version.
And by doing so, I’ve become a lot clearer on what it is I want in my life. Be it the type of relationships, my work or career, where I want to live. And when I look at my vision board, it’s exactly that: the glow up, the light and softness, the healing (all words I have written down on that board).
Stepping away has suddenly brought me closer to people who have always been there. I was just too scared to let it happen. It has brought me closer to myself and who I am at my core. It has opened up the space for conversations that I was too shy to have, but which have been some of the most genuine and aligned actions. It has given me the strength and confidence to allow new relationships to unfold, based on the new me, rather than the scared and insecure me. It has brought so much insight and healing, I don’t even know where to start in that section.
But two of the most important learnings so far have been:
Sit with the uncomfortable. Stop running, and simply be. Slow down. Let it unfold. You’re in no rush.
It’s not an either-or, but an integration. I don’t need to choose between building a career for myself and having fun with my friends. I don’t need to choose between beach or city. There’s a way to have both. I don’t need to choose between being strong and confident, and soft and caring. I can embrace all sides of me. It’s simply a question of how I can integrate all sides and perspectives into my life. How I can respect my priorities, boundaries and goals without neglecting myself.
Returning to this
Which brings me back to this post. Allowing myself the space to explore again, to let go of the hustle and the discipline and the pressure I put myself under, is bringing me back to what sits deeply in my heart:
A craving for connection and community. For softness. For light and joy. For safe spaces. For growth.
And when asking myself how much I am living this in my day-to-day life currently, the answer is “not much”.
So, one way to bring more of that back into my life is to return to “this”. Be it Soul Vibes, The Authentic Social Club, whatever name it will be in the end... it’s not about the name, but about the community behind it. About creating a space to feel seen, to share, to grow, to overcome challenges. To create subtle but powerful shifts in perspective that allow you to take one step closer to who you are at your core.
And by me doing this, sharing my words, it allows me to take one step closer to my core too. So although our journeys are magically unique, they are somehow intertwined. But it needs someone to start the conversation, and that’s who I’m trying to be. I’m not here to tell anyone what to do, simply to offer my own learnings and insights over time. Be the mirror to your self-reflection.
Exploring my true nature
I’m following my nature, which isn’t the tough, competitive woman I thought I needed to be, but a softer, more grounded and calm version of myself.
She’s clear on who she is and what she wants. And I don’t mean that in terms of a big house or a certain amount of money in my bank account, but in the energy she radiates and what the base layer of life feels like. Because all those other fancy things can only unfold if I’m grounded in who I am, at the base of my life.
So this return is not loud or revolutionary. It is quiet, intentional, and deeply personal. And somehow, more real than any shiny new chapter I thought I needed.
Take it at your own pace
If you’ve read this far, I want to make sure you get some kind of value out of my ramblings, which is what this post feels like:
Do life at your pace. Give yourself space to breathe, to heal, to learn and grow. You’re allowed to pivot, to take detours, go on adventures and then return back. You’re allowed to shift your perspective and change your priorities. It’s your unique journey.
But here’s the thing: it’s not always going to be comfortable. And sometimes we need to sit in the uncomfortable to let our truth come out. To feel into what we truly desire, deep in our hearts. And to then have the courage to acknowledge and follow that calling.
And if you want to talk about it, you know where to find me.
Caitlin x
Hi, I’m Caitlin and this is my little space to share my story, thoughts and learnings. There is so much to unpack, still to discover, and I want to take you on that journey with me. Because everything is a little more fun when experienced together 🧡.